One of these days... I'll write more frequently on this blog.
....I'll stop procrastinating my school work.
....I'll be able to see the bumper sticker "Coexist" without immediate road rage.
...I'll see a newborn baby and not crave another of my own.
...I'll understand the wisdom in early to bed, early to rise.
...I'll stop equating everything to a Dr Seuss book.
...I'll view change as an adventure not as something to dread.
We've had a busy couple of months at our house. There have been some major changes which while expected were not particularly easy. And then there were the unforeseen consequences of the changes. Life has a way of throwing things at you whether you're ready to catch them or not. I think that I have learned some lessons. I hope that I have learned some lessons or the last year has really been a difficult waste of time. Moving was something that we had anticipated having to do. Having it always in the back of my mind was getting very stressful. What was going to happen next? When would it happen? What would we do then? Etc. Throughout the process, I prayed for understanding and guidance as to what we should do. But I prayed in general if that makes sense. Generally for help to make it through what seemed to be giant trials. At one point, I broke down and pleaded for help in knowing what to do and for help in knowing what would be the right choice for us. Within a week, we had moved. The reasons for our move involve some bad decisions, poor financial management and what I think is some very bad behavior on the part of big banks and the government but I'm not going to go into that because there is nothing that I can really do about it except get really angry.
Instead, we are, as a family, embarking on a new 'adventure'. We live in a neighborhood. With sidewalks and a garage. We are "in town". We are going to a new ward. (church group for the non-LDS out there) Living closer to the high school & soccer fields has advantages that are obvious. Over the past month, there have been some adjustments. The kids have done well for the most part although there have been a couple of moments that were hard for them. All in all they seem happy. The one downside that everyone agrees on is that Grandma is not next door.
Not living next to Grandma and Papa is pretty emotionally hard on everyone, even those who aren't directly involved, like cousins who like to play at Grandma's but also have the perk of walking next door to our house. Here is what I've decided to learn from this whole situation.
Living next door to Grandma and Papa for most of the last 16 years has been a blessing that most kids never get but my kids had for years. While we could wish that this would have continued indefinately, I think that it's better to be grateful for what it was and realize that the relationships that we have with family transcend geographical boundaries.
Change doesn't have to be the enemy and learning to deal with change is a skill that everyone needs to have. Life doesn't work out the way that we plan. Ever. If you are lucky enough to have never been thrown a curve ball, I hope that you're ready for something crazy to come your way.
It was a very big lesson for me personally to see prayer in action and understand that my Heavenly Father is looking out for me on a personal level. Most importantly He understood at what point I was ready to break. It is a lesson that I shared with those close to me and I hope that it reminded them that He is looking out for them, too. While we are being tested and tested and tested, we are told that we will not be asked to do what is beyond our ability. I think that we all have more ability than we are sometimes willing to own.
I have been awed and inspired by the openness and willingness of my kids to take this change in their lives in stride. They have been able to weigh the pros and cons. And they have been able to see the good in a situation that might not be what they would have wished. While that is a lesson that I wish that they didn't need to learn, it is a good one because they will also be thrown curve balls.
I'm learning that change doesn't have to be a bad word. I might write more frequently on this blog. I doubt that I'll stop procrastinating anytime soon. I'm still up at 11 so I haven't grasped the early to bed thing. Dr Seuss will probably pop into my brain frequently at least until Tate is older. I'll try not to road rage outloud about the bumper sticker 'Coexist' but right now just the thought of it is driving me nuts. I'm getting a new niece or nephew in the fall so I'll have to learn to smell, snuggle and enjoy...and then give the baby back.
One of these days is every day, I guess. We just have to keep moving forward no matter what life throws at us. Learning lessons as we go, whether we like it or not.
